I hope you enjoy my rant below, but just remember that I’m describing my experience and what I believe is right for me. In no way am I making a recommendation regarding treatment or medication for anyone else. You do you, I’ll do me.
I am a firm believer that having a big brother makes you tough. I have a big brother and when we were younger, he took this responsibility very, very seriously. After figuring out that his role was to toughen me up, I realized mine was to teach him how to deal with other people pushing back (we were very astute 5 and 6 year olds).
At first I would get back on him by simply telling on him. But then I found that it was far more effective to just fight back- I was able to inflict my own brand of justice without being called a tattle-tale. I think it was this experience that shaped the way I approached bullies the rest of my life. I rarely tell on anyone, I usually try to deal with them on my own. The problem with this approach is that the bully usually doesn’t get caught hitting first.
I remember one year my brother and I went with some family on a lake trip. We were still fairly young- probably 9 and 10. We had docked at a beach and my brother and I were playing in the sand. He instigated an attack on me (I’m sure by splashing me or throwing sand). And I fought back, probably with more sand or a more violent water splash. Nothing out of the normal for us, except one of the adults turned just as I was retaliating. And I vividly remember being removed from the water and punished for fighting. Despite my protests that my brother started it, the adult said, “No he didn’t, I saw what you did.” I was furious. How could this adult chastise me like this when I was just sticking up for myself? I learned the hard, embarrassing, and swim-free way that those who throw the second punch are usually the ones that get caught.
I had a similar experience this morning when I was sitting in the office of my new neurologist. Just so I don’t worry anyone, I wasn’t visiting the doctor because anything is wrong, but because I keep getting denied for life insurance because I’m not working with a neurologist to manage my MS. Which, in my opinion, is total BS, but it’s not illegal.
For those who don’t know, I made the decision almost five years ago to manage my Multiple Sclerosis through diet and lifestyle. No pharmaceuticals involved. I weighed my options and made what I feel was the right choice for me. That’s the beauty of living in the good ol’ U.S. of A. I can make the best choice for me and you can make the best choice for you. Right?…
I went to this neurologist hopeful. I was really looking for someone who, even though they may not agree with me, could help me blend the innate intelligence of my own body with the best modern medicine has to offer. That’s all I really want out of any physician. But boy do I have egg on my face.
We went though my medical history and my decision to not take disease modifying drugs. And at that point, he sure expressed his own opinion on my choices. The conversation went something like this (to the best of my recollection):